Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The Karate Kid Konsequence

Daddy took our kids to The Karate Kid the other day.  Thought it would be a fun, maybe slightly educational ("wax on, wax off" with Arnold from Happy Days, y'know?) and entertaining movie.  But it sounds pretty hardcore.  Apparently, there are some  freaking scary bully moments that I don't remember Ralph Macchio, or myself as a chickensh_t  pre-pubescent patron, having to endure.  Or did I?  Apparently the kids weren't sure they wanted to stay!  Do you ever totally whiff it when it comes to age-appropriate movie content?  "Sorry, Junior, mommy didn't realize the whole town was going to be obliterated by a radioactive serial-killing asteroid!  Shall we change your pull-up?"

Ultimately, the kids survived and came home with mini posters of Jaden Smith doing that wicked cool kick.  The Duck held his up to a light and said "Look, I'm woasting my postew!".  But then the real danger that arises from age-inappropriate exposure kicked in....there was about an hour of hand to hand combat while Daddy desperately called out "No, No, karate is what you do so you don't have to fight.  It's for making peace!"  Kidney chop, roundhouse, wild poking motion....sigh....

By the way, if you'd like to get the Full Scoop on what your kids are about to go see, or rent, go to screenit.com (scroll down on the left to Australia says new 'Karate Kid' too brutal for kids) and you'll get an extensive, comprehensive description of the content provided by and for parents who want to know these things. Wish I'd done that.  Apparently The Karate Kid is great for 12 year olds.  Our kids are 7 and 3.  Whiffed it.  

Monday, June 21, 2010

Where there's smoke...

Okay, I can't resist.  I know this is old news.  And I did not want to stoop but down we go....
It's the smoking toddler in Indonesia.  He's on my mind as I lie awake.  2 packs a day.  If someone doesn't intervene with some Nicorette or a patch or Wellbutrin or NEW PARENTS there will be an international disturbance (and we already have enough of those).

What freaks me out further is that in the picture I saw he's wearing a leather jacket while he smokes.  So now toddlers everywhere are going to think it's cool to smoke.  Rim shot, cymbal splash.  There are so many jokes swirling around this awful situation, but it is so Not Funny.  His father claims he has tantrums when he doesn't get a cigarette.  Not sure where to go with that, except possibly jail.  Please, some Human Rights activist somewhere, please take care of this.

Wait....stop the presses.....as I write this, I learn that this little boy is now getting some help (though if you click that link you will be disturbed by the reason).  Alright.  Except when I googled "toddler smoking", pictures came up of more toddlers smoking.  And I learned that, to quote reporter Trish Lamonte of syracuse.com,
"a study by the child protection commission in Indonesia shows a growing problem among children. Between 2001 and 2007, the number of children between the ages of five and nine who smoke increased 400 percent, according to the study."
What the? Is Indonesia the only country where this awful increase is happening?  I have a feeling it's not.  I'm now not feeling so bad that my kids had 2 desserts today.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Bad Mothers

Last week was a whirlwind of migraines, stomach aches and tragic food choices - not for my kid but for myself. If I can't take care of myself, who can I take care of?? Sheesh. Bad Mother. To top the week off, our fab fellow blogger Rachael Chatoor allowed us the pleasure of hooking up with mommy celeb Erica Ehm who's apparently ALL ABOUT being a Bad Mother. Or bad-ass, anyway. In her YummyMummyClub you too can feel like a M.I.L.F. Thankfully, Erica's new definition is "Modern Inspired Life-makers Freakin' multi-tasking babes". And I can work with this. If you feel like your kids don't fully support your bad-ass self, just read them the Mischievous Mom At The Art Gallery a few times (written by the queen of bad-assness herself) to get everyone straightened out. A'ight?
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