Friday, January 15, 2010

On Turning 3

Oh dear!  Please help me name this phase.  All of a sudden he's more articulate...more perfectionistic...more rude...and in the week or so before and after his 3rd birthday, The Duck has, in chronological order:

--taken his grandmother's passport from her purse and stowed it in a remote cupboard (the morning of her flight home)
--pooped his undies (fully) for the first time ever
--emptied half a family size box of cereal on his bedroom rug
--drawn an extensive mural on our living room walls
--sent my cell phone to the "Doom Dimension" (wherever his favorite hiding spot of the moment is)
--screamed about the shape of his waffles
--eaten a contraband lollipop while hiding under his bed at bedtime
--told me all the food I give him is Dumb
--ground playdough into the playroom carpet
--called me Butt Face
--told me my face looks like a Butt

So I bet you're wondering what I was doing while all these things happened?  Well, the usual.   Laundry,  talking to my sister on the phone, working on my computer, preparing somewhat balanced snacks or meals, crying about Haiti, cleaning, handling Mr The King, chasing The Duck himself to retrieve the stolen goods while threatening a MAJOR time out (imagine his mocking chipmunk voice: "Ha!  Time outs have no power over me anymore, cardio-challenged Mama!").  A few of the above events occurred while Nanny L was around too, I'll have you know.

 Up until now, The Duck has been the Easy Child, as opposed to his big brother.  I swear this kid needs six times the supervision he did a few weeks ago!  His twos were not terrible....but what do we call this already rocky year?  Threatening Threes?  Thrilling Threes?  There'll be a prize for anyone who can nail it!

Knee Deep


  1. We found 3 a lot more scary than 2 and 2 was pretty scary LOL

    Good luck! That's why they are cute, keeps them alive.

  2. Yep, I remember my daughter turning three and thinking, "gee, the 2s weren't so terrible"-- only to be knocked on my ass by her physically and mentally every day until she turned 4 . . .

  3. ps: my son's now 2 and a half so I've still got one more round to go. Give me strength!

  4. Should we name it the "Theriouthly Thtrethfull Threeths"?

    3 was a mad ride for us too! I remember wondering what the fuss was about when my daughter was 2... and then along came 3. I also remember being promised that 4 was glorious. Boy did that person pay. Age 5 does bring some mercy, however. (Entering Kindergarten doesn't hurt!)

    Take a deep breath and ride that crazy ass wave, sister.

  5. My dentist has a name for every age. When he referred to the F#*king 4's, I realized we were going to need a pediatric dentist.

  6. Sigh. Good luck, Kiki. Is a harness really that sadistic, I start to wonder? The dentist comment cracks me up...young kids really help one develop a crust, huh?

  7. Hey Saf!
    Hope you guys are doing well... we are, though lots of snow. I just wanted to tell you that that article is hilarious. When i told one of my good friends about it, she started laughing crazily. It must not be nearly as funny to you and Pritch, though! As for making a name, what about "thoroughly tiring threes" or "Thrilling Threes, but not in the good way"?

    From my mom:
    My absolutely perfectly sublimely easy-going daughter changed just before her 3rd birthday, too. I remember the exact moment. A few days before her birthday, she looked up at me sweetly and said, "Mama, I want to be three now." I chuckled good-naturedly and replied: "Oh, honey. You can't be three now -your birthday isn't for a few more days!" At which point some switch deep inside her ripening brain flipped and I watched with horror as she dropped to the ground and screamed at me "I WANT TO BE THREE!!!!! NOW!!!!!!!" And proceeded to have a full on tantrum the size of...well the size of her brother's.
    She next attempted to climb out the cat door and screamed about that, too.
    Welcome to the threes. Four is easier.
    xoxoxo Mara


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